Urban Fox (with cub)

2010-03-30T10:27:00.004Z

And so, tis done.

I have moved (online) home.

You can now find me here:

http://jodiebell.typepad.com/

I hope you'll like the new place :) Let me know your thoughts!

xx

2010-03-16T22:10:00.003Z

Urban Fox is going to a new home. For many months now I haven't felt right about this blog. I have held back much of what I want to write, for reasons I haven't really understood (or had time to think about). It's become a family space more than anything, a record of what we do, with a little bit of blandess about what I'm up to. I want more than this from my online space. And the mists and confusion about what to do are slowly clearing. I am more than this. I have more to say, to share, to offer, to give, and in doing so I hope to give myself the creative and intellectual outlet I am craving. So, there's change blowing in on the winds....

More soon....

2010-03-09T15:44:00.001Z

I am unravelling...

http://www.susannahconway.com/unravelling/

and it feels good, if a little raw...

2010-03-05T22:27:00.002Z

I love my iPhone. I love this app on my iPhone that takes old school style photos. I love the subject I have to practice my photography on, especially when she gives me such cheeky gorgeous grins as these!

2010-02-27T22:59:00.001Z

Spring is far-too-slowly-for-my-liking beginning to spring! Now if only we can have some sunshine, no mud, and temperatures hitting double figures...

2010-02-27T21:49:00.004Z

My now recovered toddler doesn't quite go for the 'mummy is recovering from the flu' excuse to sloth about the house. So I caffeined up and we spent a great day out at Whipsnade zoo with Liz and Jones on Friday. Sophia's puddle magnet was set to maximum, and given it has been raining most of the week she had a marvellous time sploshing in the various puddles around the place. I love that Sophia cannot say hippopotamus, and comes out with either 'hippobottompusses' or 'hippomaspottums'. I usually avoid like the plague being the parent who uses their toddler as a performing monkey, but was guilty today of asking Sophia several times to tell various people what sort of animal Flora was (she was a pygmy hippo) just so I could grin inanely at the cuteness of her mispronunciation.

2010-02-27T21:33:00.000Z

I am beginning to develop a lion obsession, given the number of photos I took of them. If I believed in star signs I'd say it's because I'm a Leo. But I don't. So I won't. Still, they are magnificent creatures, and I'm always glad to be the other side of the glass from them.

2010-02-27T21:23:00.003Z

Mmmmmm, what's for dinner?

2010-02-23T18:18:00.002Z

Just been doing yoga with my little wonder. Mercifully she was on day 6 of her flu and well enough to go to nursery. I took my first sick day since going self employed. I miss family even more acutely when I have
no one to help and I'm like this! Had some crazy dreams in my fevered state, and time to think a little (mostly about all the things I should be doing but wasn't) lots to think about as always. Life just flies by, days are weeks are months and I am determined to Live, carpe dieum, make the most of my time here and now. Will I ever stop wanting more??

2010-02-15T21:57:00.002Z

It's a lovely age when Mummy knows everything, ok, most things, and Sophia aspires to walk in my shoes (quite literally, on occasion, with my boots going up to her behind), wear my glasses, brush my hair (whack my head with the brush whilst occasionally getting the bristles to make contact with my hair), be with and do whatever it is that I am doing, but very much with her own take on things 'NO Mummy, ME do it'. I know this age will end, but as with each preceding stage, I am confident that the next one will bring new wonders and joys with the new challenges, and that I will learn as much from my daughter as I teach her, probably even more.

2010-02-08T22:15:00.008Z

We paint, we glitter, we glue, we cut, we paste, we sprinkle, we draw, and by the end there are little sparkly flowers and butterflies and glitter and pompoms and coloured matchsticks and cotton wool and shells and sand and stickers and paint and glue strewn from one end of the flat to the other, smeared on our faces, dripped on our clothes, stuck to our feet, splattered on the table, scattered on the floor, and we sit back, cuddle, and admire our handiwork and watch it dry with a feeling a satisfaction.

2010-02-08T22:15:00.001Z

This sums up my mood.

2010-02-08T22:13:00.000Z

Dancing with Daddy.

2010-02-02T12:14:00.003Z

So weary. Handed my dissertation in yesterday. Now maybe my headache which has lasted 6 days can start to subside. Or maybe I'll need to get someone to undo the knots in my neck before that can happen. Going to have a much needed quiet week to recharge before picking up the next few essays that need to happen. I have lost sight of a few things the past little while. Need to try to find them again. Hopefully with rest, sleep, time to myself (hahahahahaaa what's that when you've got a 2 1/2 year old and no family nearby??) maybe I can find the space to take a deep breath and keep going, and to understand, and see the way forward.

In the meanwhile, Sophia and I will keep baking cupcakes and hope for the weather to start to warm up because I am so over wearing 6 layers and bulky coats every time we leave the house!

2010-01-09T14:21:00.003Z

I've just watched Stu and Sophia head off into the winter wonderland of the snow covered park, my heart longing to join them but my head firmly fixatated on getting my dissertation ready to hand in on Monday. Finished or not, whatever I have produced by the end of Monday is being submitted for comment, as I need a few weeks to do the re-writes which I am sure will be forth-coming. I am finding this final year of study incredibly challenging and exhausting. Part of me wonders how on earth I am going to find the time to undertake all the work which needs to be done. There is no respite after handing my dissertation in at the end of January: thereafter are two essays, then revision for 4 exams in May/June. Sometimes I think I need my head checked. I will find a way through, because I have to, because I want to, because it still interestes and engages me, but I may well be certifiable by the end of it all. I wasn't going to bother going to my graduation ceremony over the summer, dressing up in the gown and all that, but if I get through the next 6 months, and pass my degree, I'm bloody well going to celebrate it. I've worked my ar*e off to get this far and making it through to the end of exams is going to be a stretch. If I make it through, I will be acknowledging the hundreds of hours I have put into this qualification, and then I might have a wee lie down, small person permitting ;)

Sophs and I did manage a few fabulous ventures into the snow-laden park during the week, rugging up like marshmallow (wo)men to combat the 2 degree outside temperature. We made snowmen, threw snowballs, crunched footprints with biiiiiig steps and little steps, and just savoured the texture and taste and sound and sight of the acres of snow around us. Although, on balance, as beautiful as it is, I'd rather be in a heatwave!

2009-12-26T23:21:00.001Z

Merry Christmas to all, and to all, a good night.

We had a lovely one.
xxx

2009-12-24T12:29:00.001Z

Snow snow snow snow snow snow snow snow snow!

Lovely to look at, not so nice to drive on.

2009-12-24T11:32:00.002Z

It's the family time of year - celebrated Marie's 70th last weekend in the snow, and finally got a picture of all of Stu's family who made it to the party.

And it's Christmas tomorrow! We have a huge turkey in the fridge, and I'm looking forward to cooking up a feast :)

2009-12-24T11:10:00.000Z

Brendan the bear had to come to Grandma's party too. He had a fabulous time, caught him in the liquor at one point!

2009-12-11T19:48:00.002Z

Muddy puddles are made for splashing on a grey day in the park. Mummy not feeling well doesn't dispel the energy of a 2 and almost a half year old who was taken for a slow paced amble over muddy grass and wintry paths, slipping and sliding on soggy leaves underfoot and chasing down skittering squirrels. We met a chocolate coloured labrador who kept bringing us her ball to throw down the hill, Sophs commented 'she's lovely and friendly Mummy!' Mummy thinks she needs to invest in a pair of wellies, as her (no longer) white trainers were revealed to have a hole in the sole, and soggy socks are no fun. Unless you're a two and almost a half year old, in which case dashing giggling through deep puddles, filling your wellies with mucky water and wearing mud from toe to top is the very definition of a grand day out. On the way home, said with a huge grin and sparkle in her eyes, (too tired to walk and being carried by a now equally muddy Mummy) 'that was lots of fun Mummy, splashing in the big biiiig biiiiiiiiiig puddle'.

2009-12-10T17:27:00.001Z

It's been a week of flu...of the porcine variety. At least, as far as anyone can tell me that's what I've got as no one actually wants you to set foot in a doctor's surgery and happily prescribe Tamiflu over the phone after hearing your symptoms. I have to say if it is swine flu, then I've been much much sicker previously with regular winter time influenza. Or maybe I've just been lucky and have had a mild version of it. Still, it's not been pleasant. If I'd had anyone to look after Sophs I would have happily slept all week.

2009-12-08T14:52:00.002Z

Having spent yesterday throwing up and feeling utterly shite, my little angel came in to see me in bed and hopped up next to me, gave me a big cuddle before grinning at me and saying 'Mummy all better now', and then hopping off and going to see Daddy to tell him 'I gave Mummy a cuddle and made her happy', bless her sweet little soul.

2009-12-06T21:28:00.002Z

Yep, it's really cold here. But with a warm jacket and a woolly hat, who says you have to sit indoors??

My little mud monster in her red boots loves her tricycle, though we really should have put her wellies on, but at least the boots are washable (can't believe 'machine washable is a consideration when buying shoes these days!). I think I might finally have to resort to buying wellington boots myself after trashing a pair of trainers whilst chasing a small person with selective hearing across the muddy grass. No longer will I wear my red woollen coat to the park when it's been raining either!

2009-12-06T20:48:00.002Z

A rare photo of the three of us. I couldn't tell you the number of times we have walked through this gate from the walled garden opposite our flat. I like that we are in motion, linked through our wonderful little Sophia, in a place that we hold dear in our hearts.

2009-12-06T20:42:00.001Z

Teddy bear heaven in Hamleys. Sophs was so beside herself with excitement she didn't know where to look first!

2009-12-06T20:34:00.002Z

Miserable, but beautiful weather the past few days...with gusting rain storms sweeping tornadoes of rain from the horizon to pound our windows, before swiftly flying on to drench the terrain onwards and away. Taken from our bedroom window.

2009-12-06T20:32:00.002Z

Ah the things you scorn parents for when you are not yet a parent yourself. I recall seeing tantuming children in shops and feeling appalled by the parents who resorted to bribery to quiet them. How times have changed! Sophia now owns yet another teddy bear, purchased entirely as a bribe to buy me time to look around our local Borders which, having gone into administration, is having a huge closing down sale. She got to drag Barney around the store in her shopping basket, I got 30 minutes of relatively hassle free shopping for a fiver. Everyone was happy. I no longer judge parents the way I used to!

2009-12-06T20:30:00.004Z

I bought Sophs a gerbera to care for, and she has been enjoying carrying 'Plant' around the house and helping to water and care for it. It has the prettiest flower, I never tire of looking at its delicate pink and cream hues and running my finger over its silken petals.

2009-12-06T20:27:00.003Z

After a lazy Sunday lunch at home with Stu's school friend Pete we went for an amble through the park and fed the ducks. Sophs was doing 'one for you, one for me' with the bread for the ducks.

My little girl is so sweet. Bossy, but sweet! We're encouraging her to 'use her words' rather than yell or scream when she (understandably) gets frustrated at not being able to find or get the words out that she wants. And offering her alternatives to her behaviour, so that instead of only hearing 'don't do that' she then hears 'why don't you try saying/doing XYZ'. It must be frustrating knowing that the jigsaw puzzle of life is so big, but only having some of the pieces and wanting more.

2009-12-01T22:20:00.002Z

I had the parenting mirror held up by my darling Sophia, who hauled Albert the Bear out of her doll's crib and sat him against the wall in 'time out'. Word for word saying exactly what I say, she spoke to Albert, told him what he'd done, and to stay put until she came back. After returning to the crib to soothe and cuddle her dolly (whom Albert had apparently kicked while they were supposed to be sleeping) she gave Albert a minute or so alone before returning, making him stand up and look at her, explaining why she'd put him there, making him say sorry (which she said in her growly bear voice for him), then giving him a cuddle and taking him back to the crib and continuing to play again. Eye opening I have to say!

We don't have to use the timeout parenting thingy all that often, but it has been handy to have up our sleeves on the occasions where Sophs is really pushing to see where the edges of the boundaries are.

2009-12-01T21:36:00.003Z

It was not without a few tears (from me!) that we moved Sophia into her big girl's bed over the weekend. My baby is well and truly gone, but we are blessed with our delightful little girl growing and developing at a rate of knots. We've been often asked of late when we're having the second one, but I am still just so content with my precious daughter and can't yet see myself with a mewling time consuming babe in arms. Perhaps in a few years. We'll see.

We are looking forward to Sophia's Christmas concert in 2 week's time and have already been treated to some of the songs she has been rehearsing at nursery, complete with sweet hand actions and dancing. I suspect she might get stage fright seeing the sea of adoring parental faces, but it won't matter, I'll still be the proudest Mum there.

2009-12-01T21:30:00.002Z

It's that time of year again. Sophs and I had a lovely time going shopping for binkling lights for the christmas tree and putting the tree up. She doesn't quite understand the concept of Christmas, other than there are presents coming!

2009-12-01T21:28:00.000Z

2009-11-26T21:59:00.005Z

Random conversations with a 2 and a bit year old:

#1 - during a conversation about what sort of Christmas tree decorations to purchase:
Sophia - "I need lights that do binklings Mummy"
Mummy - "Binklings?"
Sophia - "yes Mummy, like this (holds hands up and opens and closes and opens and closes them)"
Mummy - "Aaaaaah, blinking Christmas tree lights!"
Sophia - (said as though I was a complete muppet) "Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees Mummy, binkling lights!"

#2 - watching the newly installed lights on the christmas tree, and then holding up her hands and opening and closing them in time with the lights:
Sophia - "Mummy, I doing binklings!"

#3 - After I got a 250Volt electric shock, Sophia, very concerned at Mummy who was now sitting down holding her hand looking a little stunned:
Sophia - (coming over to me, taking my hand in one of hers, and using the other hand to reach onto where I shocked myself and grab the area before turning around and throwing it away) "Mummy I throwed your ouch away, all better now?"

#4 - After Sophia heard a series of 'no don't do that/stop/no/that's enough' she burst into tears. During a cuddle several minutes later:
Sophia - "I crying Mummy"
Mummy - "I know darling I can see that you're upset, I'm sorry you're crying, can you tell me why you are crying?"
Sophia - "Mummy was too bossy (intake of ragged teary breath, her tear streaked little face looking solemn)"
At which point I couldn't help myself and burst out laughing and was soon joined by Sophia who also saw the funny side. Talk about being told off by a toddler. I love that she brings me into line and can remind me of just how respectfully she likes to be, and deserves to be treated.

2009-11-21T22:34:00.003Z

Sophski is now out of nappies during the day. I can't take a huge deal of credit for it, apart from a few homemade sticker reward charts for each potty use she pretty much decided it was time, learned to read her body's signals, and got on with it! I have been told by many other mums how lucky we are, with how 'easy' it's been for us. All I have to say to that is about bl**dy time something was 'easy'! The tiara and wand in this pic was a reward for getting 20 stickers. After I promised a £15 toy for the first sticker chart, and she got to 20 stickers within 3 days, I thought I'd better find some cheaper incentives for subsequent charts!

I really can't complain about my delightful little girl, she is a blessing in every way. She is full of humour, happy cheeky grins, light and energy and bounces around the house including you in her adventures. We recently appropriated a christmas card holder set to be a washing line for her dolly clothes - the pegs to hold the cards were the perfect size for her little hands. She has a mini washing machine that makes washing sounds and spins just like a real one, and we spend time 'washing' and hanging out all the dolly clothes, then having a tea party while they dry.

We had a lovely morning at an Art pottery shop this week where you choose an item, decorate it, then collect it a week later. We chose a triangular shaped plate, stuck love heart stickers all over it, and then Sophs painted it purple. After peeling the hearts off we now have a pretty little plate that I hope makes it through the glazing and firing process!

Sophs is feeling better, Stu has been in bed all day with the flu, I am in good health (nice change!) and hoping to stay that way as I plough through my to do list (which only ever seems to get longer). Someone said Christmas is only 6 weeks away. I better get on with getting ready for it, time to order the turkey...

2009-11-15T20:09:00.004Z

It's been an odd few weeks. I always feel gloomy when the clocks are turned back, and it hasn't helped that Sophia has been fighting off a viral infection for the past week or so. Last night my poor beautiful girl couldn't lie down without being in the most heart wrenching pain, and could only sleep half-sitting/lying upright, until, all of us exhausted at around 4am, passed out for the next few hours. I'm keeping her home and near me tomorrow, study will have to wait.

Unfortunately I had day 3 of Master Practitioner training in hypnotherapy today, which was due to start at 9.30am. I woke at 9.00am. I was there at 9.40am. How I managed that I don't know.

It was a fascinating weekend which again made me realise how much I love the mind, and what it is capable of, as well as how much I love language and its power. I love that the training I have chosen is so respectful of each individual, and doesn't try to impose a one size fits all solution.

I haven't said a great deal about my training in the past, or what I can do as a hypnotherapist, but that's all going to change :) I have let other people's misconceptions about hypnotism keep me quiet, but I have seen often enough that the techniques I use can and do work, and I can finally say that I am proud of what I can do with them. Like most things in life, it's not for everyone. But it works for me, and for the people who I have worked with, and some time very very soon when someone asks me what I do for a living, I will be able to say, with congruency and conviction, that I am a cognitive hypnotherapist.

Now about that sleep I need...

2009-11-10T13:52:00.003Z

Having forgotten to charge the battery on my MP3 player Sophia couldn't listen to 'my music Mummy!' on the way to nursery yesterday morning. I charged the player during the day, and had it ready for afternoon collection time.

Sophs was delighted when she heard her music coming on:
'Mummy you chujjed (charged) it!'
'Yes darling I did'
Sophia starting clapping me from the back seat, and in the same exuberant tone as I use for praising her said:
'Well done Mummy, well done, that's great'!

And my heart went all gooey...

2009-11-06T10:26:00.001Z

Our minimalist approach to halloween!

2009-11-06T10:13:00.003Z

I am guilty of not being emotionally and mentally present with Sophia the past few weeks, just so much going through my mind, trying to work out how it all gets done within the non-neogtiable deadlines.

My beautiful child put paid to this state of mind a few days ago, when, instead of being with her I was on the computer. Sophs came in and said 'Mummy come to the living (or 'libbing') room'. I started to make some feeble protest so she held both her hands up to me and said 'Come on Mummy, now!'. She led me into the living room, said 'stop', turned to her CD player which she had paused, hit the 'play' button, and said 'Just dance!' as the Hokey Pokey started playing. So I let it all go and we danced. And danced. And danced some more. Crazy, dance like nobody is watching, laugh out loud with the joy of it all dancing. Sophs got my attention, which she so deserves, and I got a reminder of what is most important in my life.

2009-11-06T10:12:00.002Z

Sophia: I want some Shreddies (cereal)
Dadddy: Where are your manners?
Sophia: (pointing to corner) Over there!

2009-09-29T14:43:00.002Z

My beautiful little baby cino covered pirate at Karmarama Cafe in the park across the road. She makes the most wonderful ARRRRRR pirate sounds as she runs around the place. Swords are next on our shopping list so we can have grand battles around the house and park!

2009-09-20T10:07:00.001Z

Had a lovely afternoon at Jone's second birthday party in Little Venice yesterday. Sophia particularly liked the bubbles in the party bag :) Thanks Liz for a great time!

2009-09-20T10:05:00.001Z

Exploring a map of the old city of London at Spitalfields markets with Brendan the bear (we've been fairly shite at naming Sophia's toys, usually resorting to such creative inventions as 'Bunny' for the rabbit, and 'Doggy' for the dog. Brendan is actually an Irish bear, and used to wear the Irish rugby kit. Until Sophia decided she liked him better au naturale!

2009-09-20T09:57:00.002Z

Attempted to attend the Matsuri Japan festival at Spitalfields market yesterday, tempted by the lure of takoyaki (octopus dumplings) and okonomiyaki (japanese style egg dish) - the crowds were unfortunately heaving, the queues 60-70 people long, Sophs starting getting a bit freaked by all the people so we ended up exploring the outskirts of the festival and then wandering around the city a while. There were whimsical Japanese stories dotted around the area, which made us smile.

2009-09-20T09:28:00.004Z

We're back! Been a long disorienting week, very surreal and dreamlike.

Stu and Sophia had a happy reunion, this pic was taken on the new camera in the park in the most beautiful dusk light. Still coming to grips with the new camera, very frustrating knowing how incompetent I still am on it, and what its capabilities are! Will get there.

Back to lectures in 2 week's time, 3 nights a week, going to be interesting trying to cover childcare, dissertation, stay on top of lectures, and a load of other life things going on. Well, good thing I'm always up for a challenge.

2009-09-02T13:33:00.002Z

Found this weedy seadragon on the high tide line at Falcon beach. He's a bit whiffy but am drying him out and will try to bring him back to the UK with me! We saw the real live version at the aquarium today, just so beautiful.

2009-09-01T14:19:00.002Z

I can't believe my little girl is wanting to ride bikes. Where has the time gone??

I can now have brief (often funny) conversations with Sophia who is speaking more and more each day. Today I came running out upon hearing one of the dogs barking to find Sophs standing looking slightly mortified, several feet from the older dog, having worked out how to unlock the back door to go outside. I asked her why the dog had barked, not really expecting any sensible response. Ah the honesty of the child - she replied with 'I sat on the dog'.

2009-09-01T14:08:00.002Z

One of the wonderful things about being away from the daily routine is having the time to allow the tiniest bit of creativity to seep back into my world. I'm starting small - with a pipe cleaner crown! But Sophs and Lauren loved them :)

2009-09-01T14:01:00.002Z

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz in the lavender bush at the Mandurah house, where we spent a relaxing 5 days in the company of Su and Matt, then Mum, Dad and my niece Lauren. Dad took us out in the boat, and on the way back to shore we encountered a small pod of dolphins. Seeing them in the wild was just magic!

2009-08-21T06:19:00.002Z

Hello from Perth! I always leave it far too long to update this blog, sorry! Sophia is sitting on my lap licking a lolly pop just having slept for 2 hours, we've spent the morning socialising, I've just tried to do a bit of my dissertation, and we're now going to enjoy this sunny afternoon after the miserable downpour of the past few days. I can't believe we are more than halfway through our visit, time is just flying by. It is going to be a big wrench to leave, for both of us. The first thing Sophs says when she wakes up is 'go see Nan?'' and off she runs to go and find her. We are having a good time, though it took me over a month before I started to feel like I could untangle myself and begin to relax. Sophs has shot up a few inches and is speaking amazingly well, the development of a child is such an incredible thing to observe, and so enjoyable. At every stage I think it can't get any better but then she goes into the next one and it does!

2009-06-14T20:36:00.003Z

Given Sophia's fascination with helicopters I figured it was time for a return visit to the RAF museum 10 minutes drive away, which we have previously visited to admire the WWI and WWII aircraft, as well as the fighter planes and helicopters. We ambled around through the hangars, Sophia ran through the loading area of the Chinook helicopter at least 25 times before I got bored, and then we stumbled across the kiddie area where Sophs was delighted beyond words to find a helicopter she could actually sit in. And stay in. For quite some time. Still, it was a lovely distraction.

2009-06-05T19:15:00.002Z

We had a marvellous time at the Royal Academy today to see the Kuniyoshi Exhibition before it closed. And zoom around the fountains in the courtyard of the gallery! I've been a bit, ok, totally zonked since my exam, and finally felt slightly more energetic today so thought we'd better make the most of it. Sophs loved taking the train, regaled everyone with choo-choo and whistle noises on the way in, was very patient as Mummy got a tad frustrated at finding the lift was out of order and the exhibition was at the top of oh, 6 flights of stairs (I will never criticise American tourists again - thank you whoever you were for carrying the stroller up!).

The exhibition was rammed, far too many people, and I quickly accepted that we would be doing a cut down version as I tried to squeeze Sophs and myself in amongst the crowd. We still got to see the majority of the exhibition; one of us provided a joyful free commentary to all around with songs and sounds themed to the images. We had dog barks and horse neighs and crocodiles snapping, 'it's raining it's pouring' to the exquisite triptych of 3 kimono-clad women huddling under umbrellas in the rain, 'crabs and seasnakes' whenever there were fish, or crabs, or octopuses (octopi??) - of which there were suprisingly many! - some lovely pics of the exhibition here.

I'm preparing to take a deeeep breath in and start running again from next week - I have 7 babies booked to run for my dissertation on Monday, it's going to be a long day, but that means I will have completed almost half the numbers I need - woohoo! (ahem, making the big assumption here that they all participate and don't burst into tears/sit there immobile/throw the toys on the ground). On top of that I have countless journal articles to read through and annotate, my Method section to write, and all my hypnotherapy course work to complete which will at least be enjoyable.

I'm also starting a 3-session sewing class on Monday night, learning how to use a sewing machine (or re-learning in my case) with the ultimate aim of being able to sew clothes, but that will have to be a few classes down the track. Should be good fun!

2009-05-30T09:09:00.002Z

After my last (nasty, glad it's over, think I scraped a pass but won't find out til August) exam, I caught up with Amy and the Tindales who are at the tail end of various European adventures. We met in the British Musuem, Stu brought Sophs down after her nap and she entertained everyone - after racing up and down steps, squishing her face against various glass doors and windows, and generally being a bundle of giggly cuteness, she decided to lie on the floor of the Parthenon gallery where the Elgin marbles are and study the map of the museum, much to the delight of a tour group of Japanese visitors who cooed and photographed her in all her cuteness. Taryn is now off to the US, whilst Ian and Sue are heading back for Perth. It was really really lovely to amble around London and catch up with them all :).

2009-05-26T14:38:00.002Z

One exam out the way, next and last exam for third year this Friday. I drove to the train station so I could cram on the train on the way into the exam, only to find that the station was closed and there were no south bound trains due to a person on the tracks. So, after manouvering out of my parking spot without reversing into the helicopter (air ambulance) parked/landed several bays down from me, I managed to hot foot it into London, calm myself down, and get to the exam on time. I can't say that I will miss taking exams when I finish this degree in May/June next year.

After exams I will just have my 4th year dissertation and hypnotherapy course work to focus on. So, not much then. I sometimes wonder how I manage to fit everything in!

2009-05-18T07:52:00.006Z

You can get pretty close to the tigers at London Zoo, as long as you go on a cold, windy day, 2 hours from closing time! Our annual pass to the zoo is so fab and this was our 4th visit. It is wonderful being able to visit just a couple of animals each time, rather than feel you have to get your otherwise-very-expensive-admission money's worth from one visit. This visit was the lions and tigers, rainforest lookout (cool video here - click on the video if it doesn't automatically begin -capuchin and tamarind and some other monkeys, sloths, and a few bugs and a very large spider), gorillas, giraffes, zebras, and a few other animals along the way. Sophs was so cute running around the lookout making ooo-ooo-aaa-aaa monkey noises, unbelievably excited as only little children can be, leaving a wake of grins and smiles behind her...

It's been a long and tiring few weeks. Sophs is on hard core antibiotics and steroids for her undiagnosed-for-at-least-7-months sinus infection and is quite miserable, teary, and waking quite a lot sobbing in the night. Her recurrent ear infections were actually overflow from her incredibly gunk-filled and painful sinuses. How 5 different GPs missed this I don't know, don't get me started on it. We are on day 8 of antibiotics and the infection is still there, much less, but still there - the 5 day courses of antibiotics we were given for each ear infection would have done precisely sod all.

We had a spectacular several hour session in the early hours of Sunday morning, Sophs was in obvious pain and crying out 'no more no more' as she grabbed her ears. Was not easy for any of us and tears were shed all around. She currently can't equalize the pressure in her ears, so if fluid builds up she has extraordinary pain. We're hoping once the infection is gone, and the inflammation goes away, she will be able to equalize the pressure in her ears again. If she can't, it's going to be impossible to take her on a plane for 22 hours...

2009-05-05T19:40:00.001Z

Crikey she's growing up fast. Sophs has very definite opinions on the clothes she wants to wear , and this outfit is styled by one Miss S Bell. I'm sure you'll be seeing hair lackys on arms next season on the catwalk, it's the next big thing.

I have exams at the end of May. No more procrastination, time to go study!

2009-05-05T19:39:00.000Z

Tired at the end of a long day? I'm not tired! Make me jump like a frog!

2009-05-05T19:27:00.002Z

We took Sophs to the zoo at the weekend and were regaled with roars when she saw the lions, ooo-ah-ah monkey noises, hssssssssing at the snakes, oinking at the pigs and opening and closing her mouth at the aquariums! We've bought a year's membership for unlimited entry as Sophs really loves looking at all the animals, and there is also a brand new fabulous kiddy section where Sophs splashed and crawled through tunnels to pop up in the middle of the meerket enclosure, and then onto the den where the aardvarks live. I foresee many happy hours spent there!

2009-05-05T18:56:00.005Z

Am sitting here listening to my poorly girl yelling out 'Mummy, here?' and 'Mummy where are you' over the monitor? Trying to find the balance between meeting the emotional needs of your toddler without them thinking that whatever they ask for they will get immediately from their own personal Mummy and Daddy servants is a challenge at times. I'm sure I get it wrong on many occasions. But with bedtime back to being a bit (understatement) of a nightmare stretching out over more than an hour, with frequent night wakings, we are a little low on energy at the moment. It's not her fault, she has had yet another double whammy with painful infections in both ears, and now has a raging sore throat and is off food (still). She's going through a bit of an insecure patch and needs a lot of reassurance and cuddles at the moment, which we are more than happy to lavish on her during the day, at bedtime and when she wakes crying in pain at night, but trying to work out what is best for her crying tired little self when 'bedtime' goes on and on is a conundrum at times. Tonight we resisted her attempts to be picked up from the cot/leave the room/go into our bed/use the toilet and gently insisted she stay in her room in her cot. And to think we have to move her to a bed some time later this year. We'll probably spend two hours taking her back to bed every night!

Stu and I had a night out a few weekends ago and used our marvellous, wonderful, fabulous babysitter - Miss Danka from Sophia's nursery, in this photo. She is quite a find for us, we don't have to worry about putting Sophs to bed before we go out, and it's quite a relief to be heading out the front door as your toddler happily calls out 'Bye! See you soon!' before disappearing back into her room from where raucous giggling can soon be heard.

2009-04-19T20:36:00.002Z

Hiding under her little table draped with a blanket is one of Soph's new favourite past-times. She hasn't quite sussed that she needs to change hiding spots, or that her peals of laughter as we 'look' for her under soft toys and behind books are a teensy bit of a give away, but we just play along, delighting in her delight at this new game.

She's teething again and her poor little cheeks are so pink in this pic. But ever the little trooper and happy little girl that she usually is she is still smiling :)

2009-04-19T20:31:00.002Z

We call this 'Blue Steel'. We're working our way up to 'Magnum'. And if you have no idea what I'm talking about you really should watch this movie: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0196229/

Pic taken today in Regent's Park, no prompting to pose required, this is actually how she was lounging against the fence and the face she pulled when she saw the camera!

2009-04-14T21:30:00.001Z

I'm almost overwhelmed by how much is going on in my mind of late...so in brief, here follow some of what's been on my mind and in my life of late.

Butterflies hatched and released, they were reluctant to leave their home, it was all they had known since emerging from their cocoon, but with a little coaxing these incredible creatures fluttered away on the breeze to sample the countryside pleasures around where they were released. I am going to order some more caterpillars (the things you can buy on the internet!) so we can grow some more :)

2009-04-14T20:27:00.000Z

A sprinkle of rain...a shimmer of sunlight...and nature's diamonds are revealed...

2009-04-14T20:25:00.003Z

With cousins Freddie and a speedy little Jemima at Easter Sunday lunch at Iain and Cesca's - as always Iain produced the most mouth wateringly magnificent fare...and I need the recipe for Cesca's dessert! Sadly Sophia will have no more cousins in the UK as Iain and family are migrating to Singapore in May to follow business opportunities...

2009-04-14T20:14:00.003Z

On the Spa Valley Railway steam train at Tunbridge Wells, which we went on over the Easter weekend. Sophs is really into choo-choos at the moment and I bought her a little train set from Ikea at the weekend, as well as a talking Thomas the Tank Engine.

Unfortunately just as we walked by the glossy black main Engine they released the excess steam with a very loud hisssssssss and a cloud of puffy humid white steam, and then pulled the very loud, very shrill whistle. I don't think Sophia could have gripped me any tighter! Once on the train she was much more excited when it started moving, and by the end of the trip was running up and down the carriages in delight.

Lionel the lion is a new addition to the family. We found him at a jumble sale, Sophs spied him as we walked by, said 'roar', put her arms out, and I got my wallet out! He is her new best friend, and when she can't find him she signs 'where is?' and says 'Liiinell'??

2009-04-14T20:12:00.002Z

Sophia had a splashingly fabulous time in the puddles outside the town hall in Wadhust over Easter. After refusing to wear her wellies all winter long, they are now her favourite shoes and she wears them whenever she can. We spent 20 minutes running from puddle to puddle and jumping about as much as her little legs could manage!

2009-04-14T20:10:00.001Z

Monkey see monkey do....putting 'makeup' (textas/marker pens, luckily washable kiddie friendly ones!) on just like Mummy!

2009-04-14T20:07:00.002Z

I do love this photo of my precious little girl. I am still so in love with her, especially when she throws her arms around my neck and kisses me, my heart swells with pure joy. She is chattering away so much in her sweet little voice now, we hear new words every day now, and she is trying so hard to string them all together and tell us all the things that are on her mind.

2009-03-29T20:03:00.001Z

Almost 2 chrysalises now (what is the darn plural of that and no I can't be bothered looking it up Stu!)!

2009-03-29T19:48:00.004Z

We're growing butterflies...5 caterpillars arrived by post last Wednesday (I bought a 'grow your own butterflies kit from the science museum and had to send off for them!), about 1.5cm in length each. 7 days later, they had quadrupled in size, and 3 days after that we have our first chrysalis. Technically we now have one and a half - a second caterpillar has almost finished encasing itself as well - it's been a fascinating process. Once all 5 are safely cocooned away I get to then open the jar they're in and transfer them to our netting cage, where hopefully, fingers crossed, we'll be able to maintain the right temperature and light and humidity so that 5 pretty butterflies will hatch out in a few week's time. I thought we were growing the same sort of butterfly, but the caterpillars were different so I'm not sure. I guess we'll find out what happens in this living version of the Very Hungry Caterpillar in a few weeks, stay tuned!

2009-03-22T13:54:00.003Z

I went to my first 'school' concert at Sophia's nursery on Friday afternoon, it was a Mummies only gig as today is Mother's Day in the UK. I'd picked Sophia up early one day and had a sneak peek of her singing the songs and doing all the actions - good thing as she sat there on Friday looking completely shell-shocked and not moving, before bursting into tears!! So we sat together for the concert cuddling and singing along (well, me singing, Sophs sniffling), before I received my beautiful rose and hand made card.

2009-03-17T19:24:00.002Z

It occurred to me today...I feel happy, properly happy and content, for the first time in a while. I'm busy, I'm tired, I never make it to the end of my weekly 'to do' list, but, it's all ok. Making the decision to slash my working hours, being able to spend more time with Sophia, and on my studies, it's one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life. And I think Sophia is happier for it too.

My studies are going really well, I just had another hypnotherapy weekend so if you want to stop smoking or get rid of a phobia let me know, those were the topics of the weekend! I'm still trying to kick my dissertation off the ground, but will get there soon.

Spring is here, one week ago it was was miserable and grey and the next there are the bright bobbing heads of daffodils and crocuses cheering the ground, and the big fat buds on trees and shrubs readying themselves to burst forth and share their glistening luminscent green newness.

Things are good. And I intend to enjoy this happy part of my life.

2009-03-17T19:08:00.000Z

Crikey! My exam timetable is up! May 26 and 29...better get my study skates on....

2009-03-13T19:59:00.004Z

So after the chaos of the past month and Stu and I living a 'pass the salt'/'goodnight'/'haven't we met somewhere before?' existence with insanely busy times at work, my studies and my being unwell, we decided that a long weekend away was very much needed. So we went to Brighton, so I could be close to the ocean (which always soothes my soul and calms my mind), so we could take Sophia to the fabulous Sea Life Centre, and so Stu could have some down time and we could all be together in a more relaxed state.

It was fabulous. The weather was cool enough to keep the seething hoardes of summer from filling the seafront walkways, the hotel was just the spot of luxury we needed, Sophia loved the Sea Life Centre and was wide eyed throughout as she saw sharks, turtles, stingrays, frogs (sea life??) and the many various fish, and we even had one (early) evening meal out at one of the oldest seafood restaurants in Brighton! We ambled around town and through the Lanes, did a bit of shopping, strolled along the seafront enjoying the view, and generally had a quiet, relaxed, happy time together. We found a wonderful children's playground where they had shipped in tonnes of clean sand and Sophia had a marvellous time playing with bucket and spade, tasting the sand, savouring the sensation of sifting it through her fingers.

Pics here: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=229690&id=679470392&l=51b15

2009-03-13T19:47:00.006Z

Not quite sure where the past month has vamoosed to! I guess for two weeks I was knocked sideways with the flu, which coincided with my last week at work. My first week of only one day a week working I decided would be a good time to get builders in to sort the hallway out (strip, skim and paint walls and ceiling) and bathroom (knock out a small wall, move the cupboard door back and move the washing machine from kitchen to bathroom cupboard). Not the most genius idea I've ever had, I should have had a quiet week! Oh well, they're gone now, unfortunately I hired muppets, our washing machine is still in the kitchen, but at least the hallway is (mostly) finished. So now we just have to get the bathroom ceiling patched and the floor replaced...not looking forward to that. But enough about our renovations...

Sophs the little bookworm has been thoroughly indoctrinated into the world of reading, and loves to sit and read through all of her books. Miraculously she doesn't draw in them either, although everything else is fair game - the table, floor, toys, walls!

2009-02-16T21:02:00.002Z

After not eating anything since the night before and spending much of the day at home sleeping through a raging fever, I managed, with the assistance of Dino, to get Sophia to have a little yoghurt. She loves sharing her food, and happily proffers spoonfuls of whatever she is eating to whichever toy is sharing her dinner table, whilst making the sweetest little pretend munching sounds. I think Dino wore more yoghurt than she ate, but at least she took a little food and water in. Particularly when she decided that Dino's head would make a fab spoon and started using him to scoop the yoghurt out of the pot with. Spoons? Where we're going, we don't need, spoons. Ten points for naming the movie that line is appropriated from...

I worked from home as much as I could today while Sophs slept, I have 6 working days left and quite a lot to do. I had an online training session scheduled to be delivered via a headset/microphone in an online classroom which Sophia thought she'd come and sit on my lap for, and concur loudly with everything I was saying with a sweet babyish sounding 'yesth' and definite nod of the head. In one part of my training I display a cartoon tiger and ask participants to use various tools to colour it in and decorate it - when the tiger appeared on screen Sophia started doing her generic tiger/lion roar whilst sitting about 10 cm away from my microphone. I had prewarned the participants that they might have an unexpected additional little trainer during the session, but hadn't quite expected such an active contribution! Towards the end of the session the participants were treated to a rendition of Iggle Piggle's song from In the Night Garden, and at the conclusion they were farewelled with a loud 'bye-byyye' and waving at the screen. I'm not sure Sophia will be hired for her training skills, but I hope she brought a touch of levity to the training sessions (not sure I'll include the roaring in my future sessions though...)

2009-02-06T20:58:00.004Z

3 weeks to go....3 verrrrrrrry long weeks ahead as I do the jobs of two people in my 4 days a week (my colleague is now on maternity leave) whilst also training up a replacement, going to uni 2 nights a week and studying for one full weekend of hypnotherapist training. I'm a bit tired just thinking about it all, but am going to break it down into little chunks in my mind to make it more doable.

Sophia will have to go back to nursery next week, having spent this entire week at home with a nasty viral infection and impressive measles-eque rash covering her little body. She is on the mend, finally. I don't think she's going to be very happy on Monday morning when we drop her off, she quite likes being at home with Mummy or Daddy. I know I won't be very happy on Monday morning leaving her there all day long. 3 weeks to go...

We had a lovely time at Sarah's naming day last weekend - Sophs loved toddling around the church hallway afterwards with this stroller, looking impishly cute in her dress and top from her Godmother. Unfortunately for the other kids there she would have been highly contagious with her virus - the rash appeared on Sunday morning, so we have contacted people to let them know what to look out for and to apologise profusely. I know kids share germs, but this one is a pretty nasty one to share around.

We're finally getting around to getting quotes on some work around the flat - some much needed redecorating in the hallway and refitting some of our cupboards so our stuff fits into them more efficiently! We could redecorate ourselves, but it would mean one would have to keep our small person occupied while the other worked and then vice versa. And it would take us hours and hours which we just don't have at the moment. More time for me though in 3 weeks...

12 working days to go...although technically I have 5 days of leave I'm supposed to take before I finish...!

2009-02-06T19:10:00.001Z

Some more pics of our snow antics are here.

2009-02-02T19:16:00.002Z

This is the view from our bedroom window this morning. Couldn't get the car out of the carpark as the driveway up the hill to the exit had iced over. There was 15cm of snow on the ground and still it kept falling. The trains were suspended so Stu worked from home which was convenient as we had to drag/push/slide Sophia in her stroller to the doctor's this morning to identify the mystery rash which had broken out all over her body and face. It is a a viral infection and she is contagious as long as she has the rash, so that's her (and Stu or I) at home for the next few days at least. Fun fun fun!

2009-02-01T22:29:00.001Z

Spring? Helloooooooooooo? What's with the snow on the ground outside? The maximum temp of 2 degrees forecast all week, with the real temp being somewhere around minus 4 taking the wind chill into consideration. Winter, I am so over you. You're dumped. Spring, come on in!

2009-01-26T20:36:00.004Z

Spring is on the way! Ok, maybe it's still a long way off, but the bulbs have just started appearing in the ground, and in Regents Park at the weekend we saw some beautiful sunny yellow blooms recently emerged from the frozen ground to sing the first notes of the song of spring. And not a day too soon. Winter depresses me every year. Grey, cold, dark, did I mention the coldness, darkness and horrible lack of sunlight?

Miserable. Just miserable.

But scatter around a few bulbs poking their heads up and my heart lifts a little as I sense the change of the seasons.

We had a lovely time wheeling Sophs through the park on her lovely pink tricycle. We showed her the two black swans resident in one of the ponds (and I found the number of people taking their photo and going ape over them quite amusing - but then again they only get white swans over here so I guess it's not too surprising!)

Sophs is having another growth spurt -the jeans that fit her perfectly 3 weeks ago now hover above her ankles! Kids will do that, I guess. She's chattering and singing away more and more each day, and certainly knows her own mind. Can't think where she gets her stubbornness from.

2009-01-26T19:49:00.003Z

I am a lobster (stay with me on this one!).

On one of the forums I'm on someone posted the (long) excerpt below, which really resonated with where I am in my life at the moment. I finish my 4 days a week at the end of February. I have been asked and have decided to stay on for one day a week as a consultant, in one of the departments which I currently support. I am halfway through my hypnotherapist qualification and thinking about the business I will set up from it later in the year, and have just found a supervisor for my fourth year dissertation for my Psychology degree, which will be on an aspect of how toddlers use imitation to make sense of the world around them (I get to observe 25 toddlers at play, which might be someone else's idea of hell, but I can't wait, it won't feel like work at all!).

So, back to this lobster. There's a lot of change going on. I've not walked this road before, and frankly all this change is sometimes terrifying and overwhelming. Then I read this, and realised it's definitely time for me to shed my shell so I can grow and develop in the directions that are so attractive to me. Feel the fear and do it anyways. Life's too short. Just do it. Yes you can (thanks Obama!).

"I met an oceanographer who asked if I knew how a lobster was able to grow bigger when its shell was so hard. I had to admit that learning how lobsters grow had never been high on my list of priorities. But now that he had mentioned it, how in the world could a lobster grow? The only way, he explained, is for the lobster to shed its shell at regular intervals. When its body begins to feel cramped inside the shell, the lobster instinctively looks for a reasonably safe spot to rest while the hard shell comes off and the pink membrane just inside forms the basis of the next shell. But no matter where a lobster goes for this shedding process, it is very vulnerable. It can get tossed against a coral reef or eaten by a fish. In other words, a lobster has to risk everything in order to grow.

I found myself preoccupied with the lobster story for days after hearing it. I finally realized that it was a symbol. The lobster could teach us that the only way to endure the passage of time and the limits of our mortality is to know that we are growing and changing, that we are becoming more than we have been with each year of our lives.

We all know when our shells have gotten too tight. We feel angry or depressed or frightened because life is no longer exciting or challenging. We are doing the same old things and beginning to feel bored. Or we are doing things we hate to do and are feeling stifled in our shells. Some of us continue to smother in old shells that are no longer useful or productive. That way we can at least feel safe - nothing can happen to us. Others choose differently; even though we know we will be vulnerable - that there are dangers ahead - we realize that we must take risks or suffocate. This year I will shed my shell, despite the dangers, in order to get ready for new and better adventures. "

2009-01-11T21:52:00.010Z

Nothing like a bit of culture on a Sunday afternoon - we visited Ancient Egpyt, Assyria and Greece at the British Museum today. Sophs was rapt, particularly with the Egyptian section, but wasn't as interested in the Assyrian or Greek artefacts, for reasons completely unknown. She studied the Rosetta stone, exclaimed 'cat' and 'miaow' when she saw the Gayer-Anderson cat, signed 'bird' when she saw a carved stone bird (Horus?), and steamed around fearlessly through the sea of fast moving legs, completely oblivious to the fact that she was far below the eyeline of most people in the room who were looking up at the exhibits, not below their knees for a little doll-carrying explorer. Gone are the days when I study intently the detail of a carving, or have time to read the explanatory notes next to each exhibit - Stu and I did tag-team child chasing. Good thing she's cute, it buys you kindness from the stranger you've just rugby-tackled who has unknowingly been on a collision course with your child.

The Egyptians were an incredible people, and I hope one day to visit the pyramids and see the tomb loot in Cairo and Luxor (and everywhere in between) and cruise the Nile. I bought myself a book on teaching yourself hieroglyphics - something to do in my spare time ;) I'm back at uni 2 nights a week, have my weekend of Hypnotherapist training this weekend, and am still working a 4 day week until the end of February. Sleep is optional.

Above: Sophia intently studying the Rosetta stone, her Hieroglyphics and Ancient Greek 101 exam is next week!

2009-01-09T19:56:00.004Z

From an email sent by my darling husband with regard to some cr*p I have been dealing with recently -he knows exactly what to say to make me laugh and feel better :D

Just checking my care factor for the week.

Nope...still don't give a f*ck.

2009-01-09T14:22:00.001Z

Love this video clip of a German weatherman who had an unexpected feline visitor wander on set during his report: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/7819843.stm !

2009-01-02T14:43:00.005Z

So, it's 2009. Where the last 8 years have gone I don't know!

I was emailed these questions and they made me think, so if I haven't already sent them to you, I hope you get something out of them:

1. 2008....was the year I did what?

2. What is your greatest lesson in 2008?

3. What are you most proud of achieving in 2008?

4. If you could repeat 2008 - what would you do differently?

5. If you could create a theme for 2009 - what would it be?

6. In 40 years time, how do you want to remember 2009 - as the year you did what?

7. What three things can you do to set yourself up to succeed?

8. How would you probably try to sabotage yourself? How will you stop?

9. What would you have to believe about yourself and the world to have a wonderful 2009?
And how are you going to create that belief system?

10. What baby steps can you take in week 1 of 2009 to start the year with a flourish?

2009-01-02T14:29:00.002Z

We made gingerbread men! Have a look at the pics here. (Click on the pics to make them bigger)

2009-01-02T14:04:00.004Z

We decided to go the Science Museum. Along with 80% of the under-10 population in London. Now that we have a child ourselves we really do muster up reserves of patience we never knew existed (and often find ourselves thinking as we watch a screaming tantruming child 'there but for the grace of god/bribery with biscuits go I...'!)! There was a queue to get into the kiddie section so we decided to wander about the rest of the museum and came across Apollo 10, the actual real one which orbited the moon (didn't land, just orbited, but still, crikey!). It was really quite small, much smaller than I thought it would have been. And it certainly didn't look like it could have been in space or survived a descent through the earth's atmosphere back to ground! So here's some pics of us standing next to this piece of history. After posing in the first pic Sophs decided that she would pick her nose as Stu took the second photo. How delightful children can be ;).

2009-01-02T13:39:00.006Z

So that's Christmas, and 2008, over! We had a quiet day, spent the morning at home with Sophs (who decided 6am would be a fab time to wake up), completely underestimated how long it would take to do pressies, eat breakfast, call home, get ready and head over to Stu's sister's for lunch. Still don't know where the morning disappeared to! Sophs had a mountain of presents (bordering on the obscene in quantity, we saved some for the next day) and had a grand time ripping paper off and playing with the packaging ;) Her favourite presents were a mini keyboard from Stu and I and a toy dog in a pink handbag from her Aussie Nan, although she has enjoyed playing with all the presents she received! Stu bought me the most beautiful cookbook called 'Venezia' - recipes from Venice and it is filled with magnificent photography and scrumptious recipes - it's my kind of cookbook, as it uses instructions such as 'some wine' and 'feeds a lot of people' :)

The downside to not doing Christmas lunch at home is there are no leftovers to snack on! Stu did however make his coca cola ham for Boxing Day which was delish. And I made a pumpkin risotto from my new cookbook which was sublime :)

More pics from Christmas day are here.

2008-12-26T14:50:00.002Z

Boxing Day stroll to visit the ducks and geese at the huge reservoir north of where we live...

2008-12-15T22:02:00.002Z

This photo cracks me up. Stu was catching up on some work after he got home and Sophs decided to join in, seeing my laptop still sitting out after my day working at home.

One more day then I'm leave until January 7th. Bring it on. I am in dire need of rest and relaxation!

2008-12-11T20:14:00.002Z

One of many wonderful advantages of having a child in your life is that you are reminded daily of the importance of operating at a slower pace, one where you notice and appreciate the detail in objects and places that, as a busy grown up, you would otherwise just not see. As Sophia learns about the world around her and takes the time to, for example, pick up a leaf, turning it over and over as she absorbs its shape, texture, size, taste (!) outline, she draws my attention to it as well. In an almost meditative fashion we sit quietly and explore together, oblivious to all else.

I say thank you every day for my daughter. I think I learn as much from her as she does from me.

2008-11-28T20:48:00.005Z

So, I finally worked out a way to buy some time, at a hefty price. I've sold my house in Perth, and I resigned from work on Tuesday. Now I have to work a three month notice period, and wait for the last few details of the sale to be finalised (the conditions of sale have been met, so it's just the paperwork to get through). It's been a big decision, and it's been quite a week. I'm still processing the changes which will happen next year. It's still not quite real, that I will have made my escape and be able to be a Mum to my beautiful girl, to have the time to give to her that I want. To not have to run from one end of the day to the other, to start the week exhausted and to finish the week shattered, to carry the enormous guilt mountain around with me every day as I try to give my attention and time to everything and everyone that requests it, only to feel like I fail them all dismally.

We'll be celebrating Sophia' 2nd birthday in Perth, if you're around the weekend closest to July 23rd keep it free!

2008-11-11T21:45:00.002Z

After a long week of no sleep and time off work caring for a sick little Sophs we went away for a long weekend to Stu's Mum's place. The three things Sophia just loves about going there are:
1) the stairs (see video)
2) the bowl of plastic lids which she carts around, empties, puts back in, repeat endlessly
3) the piano

She's back to sleeping and eating again this week, for which we are grateful and thankful. While it's wonderful having her nestled in your arms or on your lap, it's very uncharacteristic for our bubbly, giggly, wonderful little daughter.

2008-11-11T21:03:00.002Z

After a classical, gentle beginning Sophia starts on some fusion jazz before realising the camera is on her...

Either that or she's just bashing the cr*p out of the keys!

2008-11-02T20:26:00.004Z

We had a lovely time at Edward's first birthday party on Saturday. Except that my child turned out to be the one who beats all the other kids up, much to my horror. A few presents were opened in front of everyone, and being small children who can't yet speak, the pecking order was established by phyisical means. I walked into a room at just the moment that Sophia decided it was her turn on Edward's new scooter and witnessed her walking over to poor little Jones (age 13 months) and pushing him over backwards with both hands. After a swift telling off, howls of tears (from both Jones and Sophia who doesn't enjoy it when Mummy says 'no') and a five minute time out away from everyone while I tried to explain why we don't hit people (no I don't know why I tried to reason with my 15 month old either), little miss bossy britches marches up to Jones again and whacks him on the head. I am beyond mortified by this point. Another telling off and further tears all around serve no real purpose, but Jones has now worked out who to avoid - the next time Sophia walks into the room the poor little man backs away as fast as he can not taking his eyes off my little bruiser. I can't believe my little cherub (look how sweet she looks with Daddy in this pic!) reckons she's top of the pecking order!

Sophs is developing at an amazing rate, she is copying the words we say and has a basic vocabulary of about ten words now (note to self, really must stop swearing so much). I love listening to her sweet little voice, and how she sings little songs to herself, pausing to do a little dance (hip and shoulder waggle) before continuing her sweet little song. She loves helping me out and doing what I do, so we load the washing machine together, take the washing off the dryer, dry our hair with the hair dryer, stir the food on the stove, she's quite the girly little girl and loves carrying bags over her shoulder just like Mummy does. She makes my heart melt 20 times a day, and blows kisses and asks for cuddles which we are more than happy to share with her. I count my blessings daily that this marvellous, delightful little girl is in my life, and that I am tasked with her care and nurture. Now how do I get her to not hit other kids when they have what she wants...

2008-11-02T20:26:00.001Z

Autumnal delight on a Sunday afternoon stroll...

2008-11-02T20:12:00.002Z

Hmmm, so, it's still October (well it was when this picture was taken) and it's snowed already. We've gone straight from t-shirts into the heaviest winter weight coats, and I've had to scrape the ice off my windscreen most mornings this week. This is the view we woke up to on Thursday morning. The leaves are still on the trees!!!

2008-10-13T19:23:00.002Z

Sunday was a magnificent, sunny autumnal day, clinging onto the tail of summer and reminding us all how sunlight warms the soul as much as the skin. Trees are slipping off their foliage cloaks one golden hued leaf at a time, and occasional gusts send a shimmying tumble of crisp leaves chasing through the air until they settle under foot.

We spent a blissful few hours feeding the ducks and goose, pushing a giggling Sophia on the swings, admiring her balance as she clambered unaided over the arches on the toddler play frame, and lifting her to the top of a 6ft high slide and watching her joy as she wiggled herself free from the top and went swooshing to the bottom.

The weekends are never long enough to spend all the time we want to with Sophia, or to do all the things we want to do, but I guess that's just life, trying to balance your house of cards and not let it collapse!

2008-10-13T18:23:00.000Z